1 Kings 2:10-12; 3:3-14

The Book of Heroic Failures contains a story about a 1978 strike of British firefighters, when the army filled the gap for the missing firemen. One afternoon the replacement firefighters got a call to rescue a cat caught high in a tree. The soldiers rushed to the scene, put up a ladder, brought down the cat, and gave it back to the owner. The woman was so grateful that she invited them in for tea, an invitation which they accepted. After a wonderful time, they said goodbye, got in the truck, and backed away – over the cat.

Which prompts the question, “Could that rescue mission really be considered a success?”[1]  Well, it would take a wise person to answer that, wouldn’t it?  Or would it?  What exactly is wisdom, anyway?  When you think about it, wisdom is one of those things that is hard to define, exactly, but we’re pretty sure that we know it when we ‘see’ it.

I came across some statements recently, and I immediately recognized them as wise sayings – maybe you will, too: 

1. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

2. Always borrow money from a pessimist. They don't expect it back.

3. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

4. If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you.

Wise sayings all!

But even serious pithy sayings – good advice though they may be – aren’t exactly what King Solomon was asking God for in here in 1 Kings 3.  Solomon was not asking God for what might come to our minds when we hear the word, ‘wisdom’.  He wasn’t looking for some deep truth, summed up in a sentence or two.  He wasn’t looking for God to reveal to him the mysteries of the universe.  He wasn’t asking for God to give him something that could be written down, and passed on to later generations – i.e., a book of ‘secrets of the universe’ revealed to a very wise man. 

Rather, Solomon was actually asking God to do something inside of him; he was asking God to do some ‘heart surgery’.  In his request for wisdom, what Solomon literally asked for, was that God would give him, not extra knowledge, but ‘an understanding heart’.  

Walter Wangerin wrote in an article in Christianity Today that this can be translated as ‘a listening heart’.   What we generally sum up by using the word ‘wisdom’ is a ‘condition’ of having an openness of heart.  A listening heart. Having the ability to hear more than our own thoughts and words.  Wangerin writes: “… the genius of wisdom ... is the ability to open a room in one's heart for the talk – and so for the presence – of another. Wisdom is none other than the ability to listen.[2]”

And maybe that is why wisdom is so rare these days?   Who has time – or the skill – to listen well?

Listening – really listening to someone – is a skill that has a tremendous payoff, and yet, it seems to me, is seldom practiced.  For many years, whenever I do a wedding, as part of the pre-marital counseling, I administer a computerized inventory called “Prepare”.  (Pastor HeyYoung has been to training in this, and she, too, now, utilizes this tool, it’s very good!)  The couples respond to a series of statements, as to their agreement or disagreement, and their responses are compared in a printout that measures their relationship strengths and their growth areas, rather accurately.

I’ve been administering various versions of this inventory for many years, and there is a very clear trend that I’ve seen in the results:  the ‘growth areas’ for about 80% of the couples are in one of two areas (sometimes both): communication, and conflict resolution (which is just another aspect of communication).  And when you get down to the nuts and bolts of the specific statements, it is also clear that a fundamental problem in communication – i.e., reason why this is a growth [weakness!] area for so many – is the lack of ability to listen. 

People talk, and instead of listening, the other person is already formulating their response (or, their defense!)  They assume that they already know what the other person is saying, or where they are going in a conversation.  Other times, they don’t see the importance of real listening (it doesn’t matter)… and so they only half pay attention to a conversation, not understanding the lack of respect they are communicating with their ‘glazed over’ look.  Of course, none of you have ever seen that look!

There is a listening exercise that I sometimes use with couples that score low in the categories of communication and conflict resolution.  It’s kind of difficult, and I have to be careful who I use it with, not wanting to start a war in my office (although that has happened!) 

I will ask each person to write down two or three statements about some behavior/s of their partner that bothers them.  And they have to be ‘I statements’, not ‘you’ statements.  Not, “you make me sick…”, but “When you do _______, I feel like ________.”  And they need to be honest, and as clear as possible in doing this. 

Then I have them read their statements to their partner.  Simply read them. And I tell them that we’re not going to discuss these issues right now, I just want them to listen; to hear what the other is saying.  So after one reads their statements, I ask the other one to repeat what they have heard. Don’t argue it, don’t offer to solve it, don’t give explanations as to why this is/ is not the case, just repeat it. Tell him, or her, what you have heard their partner say. And you know what? They almost never can do this!  It is amazing, they can’t do it! Their problem in communication begins with not having a ‘listening heart’.

Wisdom in the Bible is the ability to know what to do in a given circumstance.  When Solomon asked for wisdom, his request comes in the context of his stating his realization that as the leader of this nation, –  the King of Israel – he was overmatched.  How could he be sure that he was making the right decisions?  Also in the context, we’re told right in the beginning, that Solomon, while not perfect in his obedience, yet he ‘loved the Lord’.  He wanted to please God.  He didn’t just want to ‘make decisions’, he wanted the make the ‘right’ decisions.

In fact, he asks God for the ability to “know the difference between right and wrong”.  He’s not talking about right and wrong in the sense of morality here. He means in the realm of his vocation as King – he knew that he was going to be making a lot of decisions.  And as King, his word was law to some degree.  But in humility, Solomon recognized that he needed help.  He wanted to make the ‘right’ decisions – the decisions that would be best for his nation, decisions that would best honor God, whom he loved.  Decisions that would stand the test of time. And he knew that he did not have it in him to come up with those answers consistently. He needed help.

And he also knew that the only source of such wisdom was God.  So we have this picture here in 1 Kings:  Solomon has a need for wisdom.  God has what Solomon needs…

There’s a part that is left out – i.e., the part that is not spelled out – that, to me, makes this really interesting.  See, we would think that Solomon’s next step would be to ask God for wisdom. But he doesn’t exactly ask God to give him wisdom, per se; I think perhaps that is because he knew that God is perfectly willing to grant wisdom to anyone who asks.  It’s part of God’s giving nature.  In other words, Solomon didn’t have to pray to God to ask him to ‘please consider granting wisdom to me.’  That’s a given – God will do always do that! 

In the Book of James (1:5) we read “If you need wisdom – if you want to know what God wants you to do – ask him, and he will gladly tell you. He will not resent your asking.” So that’s a characteristic of God that has always been true.

God gives wisdom freely.  To anyone who asks him. That is what the Bible teaches us about the nature of God, and I think Solomon realized this already.  So he doesn’t ask for wisdom, literally, he asks for an understanding heart – a listening heart.  He asks God to give him the ability to actually hear the wisdom that God so gladly imparts to anyone who asks.  Do you see the difference?

What a wonderful request!  “Lord, I know you will give me the understanding that I need in any situation… So, please give me an open, listening, heart so that I can hear what you are telling me.”

****

On January 14, 2005, a young man by the name of Shane Maixner died in an avalanche. The 27-year-old and four of his friends drove to the Canyons ski resort outside Park City, Utah, rode the ski lift, hiked up to the backcountry gate outside the Dutch Draw area, went through the gate posted with warning signs, and started snowboarding.

On the second trip down the same slopes, someone in the party shouted, “Avalanche!” but Shane could not escape. Two days later, they dug his body out of the snow.

Some of the media severely criticized the “reckless out-of-bounds riders,” picturing Shane as a novice unaware of the possible dangers. But that isn’t the true story.

Maixner and two others in his party were “avalanche-certified backcountry guides.” The men owned special avalanche gear, but didn’t bring it with them when they went to Dutch Draw. Apparently, this is not an unusual occurrence. In fact, “skiers with the most avalanche training are more likely to be seduced into faulty reasoning by factors like tracked slopes and group enthusiasm. Maixner didn’t die because he was a fool. Like his friends, he was lulled into letting his guard down.”[3]

God’s wisdom is as accessible as the things that Shane Maixner and his friends needed to know – and in fact, already knew – about backcountry skiing. The wisdom was ‘there’. But he didn’t hear it…because he stopped listening. 

There are times in our lives when we face big decisions: jobs related decisions, moving, who to marry, relationship decisions, buying property, and things like that.  Certainly, God’s wisdom is available to guide us in making those big decisions, and we need it – especially when we are trying to choose between a number of ‘good’ options, or when we’re choosing with no real understanding of where a decision is going to take us. 

We see in this passage, and in James, and other places in the Scripture that God is pleased by such requests for help, and he promises to answer us.  So it would be important, I think, for us to follow Solomon’s example, and include in our prayers the request that God would give us the ability to hear God’s response.  To give us ‘listening hearts’.  To hear, to receive wisdom from God.

But I think that it would be good for us to expand that a bit.  Because we’re generally much more ready to listen to God’s wisdom in those ‘big decisions’, you know?  But it’s so easy – in our relationship with God, just as in our human relationships – to start to feel so comfortable, so familiar, with the status quo, that we stop listening to the day to day communications, and we begin to assume that we already know everything we need to know.  We may find ourselves caught in an avalanche!

When the infamous September 11 airplane barreled into the Pentagon, Officer Isaac Hoopii was nearby but outside the building. Immediately he began helping people straggle out of the building – in some cases, carrying them out.

But Hoopii wanted to do more. Wearing only his short-sleeved blue police uniform—no mask, no protective coat, not even a handkerchief—he ran into the inky blackness of the Pentagon. Someone yelled at him to stop. “We gotta’ get people,” he shouted back.

Suffocating on smoke, Hoopii heard the building cracking. He called out, “Is anybody in here? Anybody here?” At that moment, Wayne Sinclair and five co-workers were crawling through rubble and had lost all sense of direction. They heard Hoopii's voice. They called back, and Hoopii responded. “Head toward my voice. Head toward my voice.” Following his voice, Sinclair and the others soon made their way out of the crumbling building.

Jesus saves us in the same way. He is constantly calling to us, saying, “Head toward my voice.”[4]  His voice is life.  His voice is wisdom. Let’s pray…

O God, we recognize your willingness to grant wisdom to anyone who is in need of it.  We simply need to ask, and you will give. We pray that you would also give to us listening hearts, that we might truly hear your gentle whispers, and respond to your word.  In Jesus’ Name…Amen.